I wonder how many writers feel this way.
Can you be called a writer or call yourself a writer when you're writing when no-one sees you? When you haven't published yet? When you know that writing is what you should be doing even though you might be paid to do something else?
The problem is writing is not an overnight thing. It's a journey of self-discovery while you discover the worlds you're creating in your mind.
You're asked the question, "So what are you doing with yourself these days?"
You answer, "I'm writing."
You note the confused look on the person's face as they try and recall something of yours in printed form.
Then you continue, "Well I'm busy writing a novel."
"Oh, I see." Comes the answer with a slow nod of the head. But you wonder if they really see or are they running through a set of thoughts in their minds; "Barking up the wrong tree. I wonder if that's going to work. I wonder if she is any good?"
But those unspoken thoughts are rather followed by a "Oh that's nice. What's it about?"
And then you quickly and very sparsely run through the plot and twenty seconds into explaining your story a glazed look comes over their eyes even though the smile hasn't changed.
Then you feel that familiar feeling when someone hasn't 'got you' and it's very easy to feel deflated and sometimes even doubt whether you should carry on writing. But then when you sit down later at your keyboard, you feel that wonder inside rise up again. You feel ignited as you read what your characters have been up to. You start creating some more and the fire and love for the written word and your created world grows, and then you know.
You know despite what others may say, you ARE a writer and when it does get seen by world, they will know it too.